My Friend

I first met him about 10 years ago in a church member's house. When I was introduced to him, I thought to myself "S**t, I'm not going to like this". One look at him would tell you that this is an abnormal man. After a brief conversation, I tried to be a nice guy. I tried to get him involved in our conversation. It turned out that he is 3 years older than me, but having a midget body, very poor eyesight and a below average IQ.

But somehow I tried to get him to our youth group and to our church from that day on even though I hated the idea. Being a much neglected and hated child in the family, he quickly grew his attachment to me. This has made me very uncomfortable and I tried to stay far from him. The thought of having to take care of this "midget & dumb man" brings much weariness to me. I tried to bring in a few friend to share the load with me, but nobody seem to care then. Some did try to made effort, but with his timidness and low IQ many sort of gave up and "dissappear" in the scene.

And I was one of them would slowly dissappear from the scene. But he didn't mind that at all. He called me weekly just to chat with me. I find his calls were annoying, so much so that I would try to end his calls as quicly as possible. Sensing my dislike of my calls, his weekly calls turns to be bi-monthly calls.

Sometimes I would ask God why would He brought such a person into my life. If I were to neglect him totally, that would bring shame and guilt to my heart as a Christian. So in order to supress that feeling, I just played along caring for him without total sincerity.

I did not inform him the change of my new handphone no hoping that he would end his calls to me if he couldn't reach me on my old no. But he didn't. He called me at the office. But at least I can have the excuse that I can't chat long on the office line or I'm busy with work.

He made that call again last week Friday afer a long silence. As usual he would gave his 'report' of his happenings so and so forth. But however this time he sounded really soft and I could hardly make up his words. As usual, I quickly ended the call and continue with my work without thinking much further. And that was the last time I spoke to him.

I just came back from his funeral. He died due of prolonged diabetics disease. He was having breathing difficulty on Wed night, walk into the ER room and never walk out again. He had heart failure and the doc tried very hard to resustitate him. Nobody knew about his condition. He never complained about his sickness. He is afraid that he would get scolding again if he were to complain to his family. He didn't want to be a burden to anyone, and chose to carry it himself.

But he called me to ask me to pray for him on Friday. I guess he just wanted to say goodbye. But I wasn't listening then. I was too busy. I was too busy with work say goodbye to person who consider me as his good friend.

God has been speaking to me beginning of this year about some of my attitudes, but today He spoke to me really hard. I finally realized why He brought such a person to my life. That life is short and everyone to Him is a precious soul. No matter how busy He was Jesus never neglected the people. But I did. I neglected His people. And I pray that I would never will again.
As abnormal this person physically, mentally and emotionally he is normal. He feel alone & just wanted a friend. He just wanted a company where he can speak without being scolded at or laugh at.

Dear God, I'm very sorry. I'm sorry for being busy with ministry but neglected the needs of the people around me. Help me Lord to be sensitive. Amen.

And to my friend Benard Lee, may you rest in peace. You definitely have a better place in heaven.